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Tag Archives: puppalicious and beyond
Your daily dose of Petey…
Petey the one-eyed Boston terrier went under the knife for the snip-snip. You know, neutering. Why, you may rightly ask, would we do this to our sweetie Petey?
Well, when we picked him up from boarding at the super awesome Polka Dot Dogs two weeks before, they said, “Your little darlin’ is trying to become a father and has his one eye on that Chihuahua over there. And the cockapoo. Oh, and also the Maltese.”
Pooooooor Petey. In his defense, he told me all three were super hot little bitches. And he loves Polka Dot Dogs. Instead of kennels, they let all the dogs of similar size and temperament play in open rooms together. He’d like us to take him along wherever we go, but if he can’t go with us, he prefers PDD.
PDD, however, has a policy: At the age of seven months, little boy doggies no longer get to stay in open-room boarding if they can’t keep it to themselves. While I think anyone would be lucky to get the bonus of little Peteys along with the price of their boarding, I guess I can accept this.
***
Well, today the rest of this story (republished as an adapted excerpt from Puppalicious and Beyond with the permission of SkipJack Publishing) appears on the site of my good friend Sandy Webb. Sandy is an animal lover extraordinaire. She is practically the horse whisperer, and she is the “Mom” to a terrier named Tater Tot that rivals Petey for cuteness. To read the rest of Petey’s story, CLICK HERE.
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Mistaken Identity
There’s a certain resemblance between Susanne and me. Switched at birth seems unlikey.
15-year old Susanne wants to be a veteranarian some day. Never mind that she hates biology and chemistry. Those are just minor details. A bigger problem seems to be her grasp of anatomy.
Case in point: Our dog Layla has a few issues this month, of the kind that require monetary investment and complex medication rituals. Complex, but not incomprehensible. Susanne has a tender heart for our pets, so I assigned her the task of the twice-daily medications. This included drops for the ears, salve for the leg, and pills to swallow. Eight drops in each ear, then massage. Salve to leg, spread judiciously. Pill wrapped in bacon, or it is spit out.
After a week, we noticed that the leg wound (a “lick-u-loma,” so called because it is a minor infection from Layla obsessively licking herself until she created a wound — she’s really not all that smart, but she’s sweet) had not healed as well as expected. Coincidentally, I spelled Susanne from the meds-routine one morning and did them myself as Susanne ate a hearty, healthy breakfast of “slutty brownies.” Don’t wander off-topic on me: slutty brownies are a layer of chocolate cookie under a layer of oreos under a layer of brownie, cooked to a nearly raw gooey perfection. Now, back to oozing dog wounds.
“Mom, why are you putting her ear medicine on her leg?” Susanne asked.
“I’m not. These are the ear drops,” I said, as I squeezed one-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight drops into Layla’s ear , then raised her ear flap and massaged the drops down into the canal.
“You’re kidding, right?”
“No, why?”
“Because that’s what I’ve been putting on her leg.”
I stared at my daughter, wondering if she might have been switched at birth. It happens, you know. Or sometimes the stork brings the wrong kid. From all appearances, though, this doesn’t seem possible. Still… “Do you seriously not know the difference between a leg and an ear? A leg attaches to a foot and is used for perambulation. An ear attaches to the head and is used for hearing.”
“Duh, Mom.”
“Then how in the world could you be putting the ear meds on the leg and the leg meds on the ear?”
Parents of teenagers the world over know the answer to this one: “Because I, um, wasn’t listening when you told me how to do it and I didn’t read the label.”
OK, so maybe anatomy isn’t her issue.
So, our dear Susanne may be the dog whisperer, but I fear for the lives of our canine friends should she become the dog veteranarian. Maybe instead, the dog groomer? The dog walker? Or dog sitter? EITHER THAT, OR SHE NEEDS TO LEARN TO READ THE DIRECTIONS!!!
<3
Pamelot
p.s. Be first to hear about new book releases, 1-2 times a year (don't worry, I won't use your email for anything else)! <-- click here
Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater
Petey the one-eyed Boston Terrier will eat anything. And I really mean it.
Review and Giveaway: Puppalicious and Beyond
A review and a giveaway, by the incomparable Vidya Sury of my book Puppalicious and Beyond!
Is the indie journey for you?
Are you an author-preneur at heart? How do you know if you have what it takes to go indie when you were just trying to figure out whether you had what it takes to be a writer at all? Bonus: This post includes a chance to win a copy of a Puppalicious And Beyond ebook!
Nerves! Announcements!
Nausea, hives, and gripey tummy. No, I’m not sick. I just sent out 1600 announcements about my book release(s), asking for support. Now, I’m asking for yours, too. Please read this post, and learn more.
Rally Point Tango Alpha Bravo
Time to come to the aid of your friend/friendly neighborhood writer — me!