The “Last Week” or Our #30days Intimacy Challenge
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Thirty days. Thirty frickin days of real life with dogs with fleas, kids with issues, travel, illness, wrecked cars, work, errands, traffic, and a humdinger of a disagreement. How do you sustain intimacy for thirty days through all of that, the every day crap that drains the romance out of our souls and the libidos out of our bodies?
I hear you:
“What the hell did she just say? Isn’t this the woman that challenged us all to attempt this thirty day adventure, and now she says THIS???”
I know. But you can’t. Not every minute of every day.
I’m not in it for the short-run, though. Are you? The short run is composed of seconds, minutes, hours, at most a few days. Tiny pieces of our life — important pieces — but not the sum of our life. Or our relationships.
So here it is folks, one simple rule for keeping the train on the tracks, the intimacy in your relationship over the long run:
DO THE BEHAVIOR AND THE ATTITUDE WILL FOLLOW.
That’s all. Do the behavior of love, of patience, of forgiveness, of affection…and the attitude of love, patience, forgiveness, and affection will follow, sometime soon. As will the higher probability that your beloved will do the behavior right back at you. If you cradle your “injury” in your hands, staring at it, talking to it, caressing it, cherishing it…you’re going to lose a lot more than minutes or hours.
If you put that bad boy down and DO THE BEHAVIOR, in no time at all (when compared to the lifetime you are sharing together), you will kiss and make-up. Which also can be a behavior to do with an attitude that follows. And what’s not to love about that?
Happy Day 26, folks. It’s not 30 days — it’s a lifetime.
For those of you just starting the 30-day Challenge, here’s the poop.
The Deets: For the next 30 days, every single day, make time for and engage in some kind of physical intimacy with your sweetie. You may not jump under the sheets every day, but there’s a whole world of fun you can engage in. Hold hands, Eskimo kiss, gaze into each other’s eyes, etcetera. And you can’t keep this plan a secret. You have to ask your partner to participate and commit with you. You’re going to see more posts from me on this, sharing feedback from others that are participating, feedback on how this impacts their relationships. I’d appreciate your comments, or you could email me (firstname.lastname@example.org) and we could keep your input anonymous.
For other (better) blogs than mine on the challenge: